Tender Mercies

In January, when I went to see my mom, I was in shock at how far she had deteriorated.  She did not respond or talk to me at all really.  She got a new dose of steroids after that and it helped.  When I went to take care of her a month later, she was talking more, was more alert, and a little bit stronger.  She remembered my name, and called Jason, "Jason McCord":)  I was with her all day and I read to her one of our favorite books...."Daddy Long Legs".  I read for probably 5+ hours and she was attentive and looking at me the whole time.  During funny parts I would look at her and she would be smiling and I know she knew what was going on.  Later, when my dad asked her what I was reading to her, she replied, "Daddy Long Legs".
I told her about Sophie coming into the bathroom and asking me if I was "dropping a deuce", and she laughed and laughed.
My most cherished memory of that weekend was when my mom was wheeled out of the bathroom by a nurse.  I was laying on one side of the bed and when she was put into the other side she said, "Well there's my lovely daughter".  That is something she used to say all the time and I never thought I would hear her say it again.  What a tender mercy from the Lord.  That weekend was a true gift to me.  I didn't think I would see that much from her ever again.  I know it's not going to be all peaches and cream every time, but the Lord gave me a gift of one great weekend with a little glimpse of my old mom again.  I'm truly grateful.

Allie: 1 year old

Allie's One Year Pictures:

She wasn't super happy so we only got a few, but my friend Amber Sheffield of Blue Iris Photography did a great job!  It was so nice catching up with her.

Honest

To be honest, I really haven't felt like blogging.  I have a hard time thinking about what to blog about lately because the overwhelming and ever present thing in my life is the fact that my mom is going down hill rapidly and will all to soon be gone, and that is not something I like to face by blogging about it.  I don't know why but this week has been a hard one for me.  I miss my mom.  It is so hard to see her in the state she is in now.  It is just a shell of my mom.  Not the same person that calls me a couple times a week to check up on me and care what is happening in my life.     I miss the level of interest she showed in the things I tell her.  I miss her insatiable desire to play games.  Not the mom who cares about crafting and sewing and getting outside to enjoy nature.  I don't think it would be as hard if her memory wasn't mostly gone.  I can't even have a conversation with her anymore.  She doesn't really respond and it is so hard to see her just sitting doing nothing when she was never one who could stand to just sit and do nothing.  I really feel for the families of people with dementia/alzheimer's.  
I am mourning already for the old part of my mom that's lost and I'll mourn her more when she is really gone.  I grieve now for my dad....but not like this.  He is still the same (maybe a little more grouchy:) but he is the same ole dad I used to know and love.
I am dreading having to go through my mom's stuff this summer to clean things out.  I don't want to walk into her sewing room knowing that she is not ever going to do any of this kind of stuff again.  I wanted to use her stuff with her.  She is too young to die.  I wish it were the second coming already so I could have my mom back.
Ok, sobbing over.  My friend Tiffani said it so eloquently..."until these Adjustments stop coming I guess I will just continue to put on my big girl panties and enjoy the ride."  Thanks for the reminder Tif.

Autumn in review

This fall has gone by so fast.  Here is a little review.....

First Day of 1st Grade

I embroidered Regan's name on her new back pack.

{I flew to Phoenix to help my parents} 

Allie 10 months

She started walking at 10 1/2 months.  My earliest walker yet!

This picture totally reminds me of my dad.
It is exactly one of the faces he pulls:)

{I flew to Phoenix to help my parents}

 Halloween

Sophie is a Cha-Cha Dancer

Nothing cute and cuddly for Regan.  She wanted to be a scary vampire.

Getting ready to go to the annual Anderson
Family Halloween Party with
Grandma and Grandpa Joy.

Bailey is holding Allie, my cute little 11 month old flower.

Keia, Allie, Aspen, and Breanne

Trick-or-Treating in our neighborhood
with their friend Rachel.
{I flew to Phoenix to help my parents move to St. George}

Thanksgiving and Allie's 1st Birthday

I can't believe it has been a year already.  Just like the other two, she has a totally different personality.  She is kind of a goof ball like Sophie was, but not as happy-go-lucky.  She is kind of serious and, I shudder to think.....maybe even more stubborn than Sophie.  She is quite a picky eater.  If she's done eating the leftovers, they go immediately to the floor.  She has the loudest scream I have ever heard and screams just for the fun of it.  She says nana (banana), dada (daddy), mama (obviously), nigh nigh (night night), and if we say "more", she will do the sign for it.  She gets so excited when Jason gets home from work.  She likes to be held a lot and is starting to get into the same mischief her sisters are notorious for.  I just love this sweet, precious girl of mine.  She makes my heart happy:)

All I Want for Christmas are my FOUR Front Teeth

Regan has lost 6 teeth and only two have come in.

Regan didn't want money from the tooth fairy, she only wanted a letter.  This letter and fifty cents was the high light of her week!

Passing of Rose Pratt Burnham

On December 9th, 2012, at the age of 98, my grandma Burnham passed away.  There was a large tumor the size of a grapefruit in her intestines that made it impossible for her to eat/drink.  It perforated her intestine and leaked infection through out her body.  She is the best person I have ever known.  I have never heard her raise her voice, or speak ill of anybody.  She was so loving and caring and spent her life in service.  I don't even know what kinds of sins she could have committed.  She was as near to perfection as anyone could get.  

  This was taken a month ago when Lance and I went to Heber.  I suggested we stop and see grandma before heading up to Heber.  I'm glad we did.  She still lived alone and had a lively step.  I just got back today from her funeral in Mesa.  It was a lovely service and attended by so many of her posterity.  She has 10 children, 49 grandchildren, 135 great-grandchildren, and 12 great-great grandchildren.  What a legacy she has left behind!   

Sophisms

Sophie: Mom, is it fast Sunday today?
Me:  No
Sophie:  So it's slow Sunday?

Sophie:  Mom, I want the pink cup!!!  Not the green cup!!!
     [Insert lots of whining]
Mom:  Sophie, you get what you get and you don't throw a fit.
Sophie:  I already did throw a fit.

Fuzzy cell phone pics

Jason is in the girls room telling Regan a story about hunting.  Sophie is asleep, or so it seems.  Regan asks what part of the deer he ate, and Sophie says, with her eyes closed, "did you eat the eye balls?"

In the car this morning Jason is naming off the food they had at the ward Christmas party and, again, I thought Sophie was asleep, but she chimes in, "pineapple".

Sophie is doing well in school.  She thinks it's boring though and her favorite part is the show-and-tell back pack.  She adores her little sister and Allie loves her too.  She picks her up way more than Allie would like though.  She needs to join sugarholics anonymous and loves to play games and cook with me.

I looked over and found her reading a book like this.  
She cracks me up!