So this motherhood thing has been a little tougher than I orignially anticipated. I won't go into all the details....most of that is a couple of posts down. One of the hard things is church. I never realized how hard it is to have young kids in church. It would be very easy to go inactive for a while if you didn't have a strong testimony. Since Regan was about 4 months old, church has just been something you do just because you want to be obedient to the commandments...not really because you want to learn how to be better or gain any sort of spirituality. They don't sit still through any class. Just today Regan peed all over the hardwood floor in the back during sacrament and I spent a while cleaning her up and cleaning the big puddle she left. Kind of hard to listen to speakers when your kid has turned into a garden hose right in the middle of church. And the girls have crazy sleeping schedules so it seems hard to squeeze in meaninful scripture study. So what I'm getting at is I don't feel spiritual or as spiritual as I used to. I don't feel as strong as I used to. I just feel drained. It is easy to get discouraged when I feel this way and I DON'T LIKE IT!!!!!
I have desperately wanted to boost my spirituality and feel some incling of the spirit again in my life. I decided that I needed to start reading the Book of Mormon again because instead of being a daily thing it is hit-and-miss (more miss than hit). So last week I started getting up earlier before the girls woke up and I read the BOM for at least a half hour. The first three days were amazing!! I felt calmer. I felt more patient. Regan had another big mess and I didn't even freak out a little bit. I felt more love for my children and for being a mother. I felt my burdens being carried a little. I don't really like to share personal stuff like this on my blog, but I felt the Lord tell me to share it. I don't know why. I think the Lord gave me this gift and then wanted me to help Him by sharing it. In the last couple weeks, I have only missed a couple of days of reading and I have noticed a difference in the days I do and the days I don't. I'm not feeling totally great yet, but I know that if I keep reading that I will gain the spirit that I want in my life. So if you haven't been reading then start again. If you haven't ever read it, then read it. It will change your life.
I have desperately wanted to boost my spirituality and feel some incling of the spirit again in my life. I decided that I needed to start reading the Book of Mormon again because instead of being a daily thing it is hit-and-miss (more miss than hit). So last week I started getting up earlier before the girls woke up and I read the BOM for at least a half hour. The first three days were amazing!! I felt calmer. I felt more patient. Regan had another big mess and I didn't even freak out a little bit. I felt more love for my children and for being a mother. I felt my burdens being carried a little. I don't really like to share personal stuff like this on my blog, but I felt the Lord tell me to share it. I don't know why. I think the Lord gave me this gift and then wanted me to help Him by sharing it. In the last couple weeks, I have only missed a couple of days of reading and I have noticed a difference in the days I do and the days I don't. I'm not feeling totally great yet, but I know that if I keep reading that I will gain the spirit that I want in my life. So if you haven't been reading then start again. If you haven't ever read it, then read it. It will change your life.
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11 comments:
Thanks Krystal..I needed to hear this.. I totally know what you mean about kids and church. Some Sundays when Clay has to work it would be so much easier to stay home then lug all 5 kids to church only to never hear anything that was said. I have been feeling the same way and I need to have my life slow down and put my priorities in order, so THANK YOU for helping me out..
Krystal your an amazing person! I feel ya with the whole church thing. It's been such a struggle with me lately too. I rarely ever want to go and I even teach Young Women's! I just finished reading the BOM maybe I should start reading it again. Thanks again for your encouragement!
Thanks Kristal for being a good example to your mother! I have also been trying to read in the B of M more but it is still hit or miss. I know the things you said are true and will help me in my daily life. Church-time is no picnic with kids but definitely worth it!
Way to go girl. I have been slacking myself and definitely feel it. Thanks for the inspiration.
I can only imagine how much more fun church will be once I have 2. But if all we're doing is teaching our kids that we go to church no matter what, then it's worth the effort.
Keep it up! (And let's hang out this week...)
If you are trying to make me feel guilty, it's like not really working that much ok? And when do you take off for SLC??? I can't wait for you to be done with it! Love your cute girls.
Thanks Kristal for the reminder. Lately I have felt like I needed to start reading again and be consistent, but I'm been putting it off. Your post is just one more little push in the right direction for me. Thanks.
It was good to see you at Old Navy the other day! Your girls are so cute. I haven't hit the hard times yet with two b/c one is still sleeping all the time but I remember feeling that way about church with hallee before she went to nursery... youare such a good person! I am sad you are movign but excited for your new adventure!
I don't have kids yet and I find all sorts of reasons not to read and to not want to go to church sometimes. Especialy with the 9am church schedule. haha
Just know that you are not alone in this struggle, kids or no kids.
Krystal, Once again I just want to hug you! Thank you. I am so feeling overwhelmed and absolutely defeated these days when it comes to raising my kids with any sort of inspiration. I have been feeling the tug to wake up at 6 and devote some time with the Lord. Thank you for sharing your experience with us!
I read this when you first posted and was in tears at how inspired you were to write it for ME because I needed to hear it. I was leaving you a comment when baby Jon crawled over and pushed the OFF buttom on my computer. So I'm commenting now to say THANKS for listening to the spirit and sharing your honesty. It is hard to go to church week after week with kids who distract you from even hearing anything most of the time. But like Kelly said, I know it will be worth it because I'm teaching them that the Gospel is important to me.
Just like the other mom's, I too feel the same way. I try so hard, yet it rarely makes a difference. But I think most of the time it is because I am forgetting the simple things, that for some reason don't seem simple when it means getting up earlier. Yet I would do it fir a better day. I just forget that it truly makes a better day. Thank you for sharing. I am so excited that you are in SLC, hopefully that means I will see you a little more often. We will have to plan to meet with the kids.
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